because of you.

As I'm sitting here trying to think of what to write about, nothing seems to come to mind .. but you. I mean, out of the millions of things I could choose to write about, I'd rather talk about you. I'm 99.9% sure I could write for hours just talking about the things you do to make me smile or laugh. Normally I would write blogs about something I'm upset about, but lately I haven't had that many disappointments. I guess I was just so used to being hurt all the time that I forgot how it felt like to be happy without being let down. It's all because of you. Yeah I know it sounds pretty cheesy, but I don't care. You once told me " I don't believe that everything happens for a reason, " but I disagreed. I say that because without the pain that we held inside, we wouldn't have been there for each other through rough times. If we never went to that party at Jd's, we would have never had our first kiss. If I kept in that secret of liking you any longer, we'd still be just friends right now. The way I see it, everything that's happened has brought us together. But maybe that's just fate? Well whatever that was, whatever I'm feeling, I want to keep it this way. We've had such a great start, that I'm hoping it'll remain that way. To be honest, I'm still pretty hesitant on what I'm getting myself into. I'm scared of falling in too deep & getting my hopes up, that I'll end up struggling on my own to find my way out. I know you're not the type of person to show your feelings, and I understand that, but I guess sometimes I just want to hear you admit it. Sometimes I feel like it's just too good to be true. I mean, we rarely ever fight. I'm not trying to say that's a bad thing, but whenever we're with our friends, I always see them fight with their boyfriend/girlfriend. Except us. I guess we're a lot different than them. But what sucks is that whenever we do fight, it's not something small & simple, it always ends up something really complicating. When we have days like that, I just want it to end. Luckily those days rarely ever happen. The days I could probably repeat forever are those days where we're just laying together, typically watching a movie, or eating, but whatever we're doing, I like being in your presence, I like knowing you're there to catch me when I fall. I like knowing you'll be there to protect me. I like actually having deep meaningful conversations on the phone. I like being able to relate to eachother so much. But I also like the different life styles we've been through because I like learning new things about you, it helps me understand you more on the struggles you've dealed with. As much as I say I hate it, even though you ruin over 100 of my favorite songs, you still manage to make me laugh despite the fact what you say is probably something really stupid. But whatever. I know your parents may not be proud of who you've become, but just know that I am. I know you're a smart & independant person, even if they can't see it, just know there's someone that believes in you. Everybody has their flaws, but I know that one day you're going to prove them wrong and they're going to regret not having faith in you. This blog is already getting super long and I'm stilllll not done explaining everything that's on my mind about us, but oh well. This shall be continued.